The latest from Dlisted - Be Very Afraid
| The Sunglasses Come Off | Top |
| Alien Princess RiRi of the Universe stepped out in Hollywood last night wearing some shit made out of my mom's old 70s bedroom drawer liners. It's nice to see somebody put that shit to use. RiRi also kept her Ray-Bans at home. Good. "I Wear My Sunglasses at Night " can finally be taken off heavy rotation in my head's playlist. RiRi's own personal Mike Tyson was not around and E! is saying the two are on a " break ." Not a permanent break. Just a break. To most of us, a break just means you just want different dick for a week. But for Ike & Tina 2.0 it probably just means RiRi is trying to keep her money safe. I'm thinking her bitches got all worried that she might lose cash for going back to the beast who attacked her ass, so they told her to take two steps back. And hopefully, she keeps on stepping back. | |
| Morning Wood | Top |
| There's a floating peen out there that is aching to be Photoshopped into this Clive Owen picture - Socialite Life Honk 4 for the pathetic buttface ! - Popbytes I am going to sue Joe Jonas for $4 billion - Gossip Teen Recession who? Mimi's new rainbow castle will cost her $125 million - Holy Moly! The Osbournes' variety show could be the biggest failure in TV history - Scandalist Prince Willy says he has psychological power over Prince Hot Ginge . Can he bottle that and sell it at Rite-Aid, because the things I would suck if I had that power - Celebitchy Eddie Cibrian denies that he's doing wrong sexy times with LeAnn Rimes - ICYDK But that whole affair is probably just a cheap publicity stunt for their stupid ass Lifetime movie - I'm Not Obsessed | |
| American Idol: It Should've Been You, Sarver! | Top |
| Jane Mancini was voted out of American Idol last night and it didn't feel right, because Sydney Andrews wasn't there in a wedding dress to throw her in a pool or something. That's what was missing. Jane (real name: Alexis Grace) was put in the bottom with that sack of stale potatoes Michael Sarver . Fuck me with a lame dildo, he's boring. Sticking your genitals in a bowl of uncooked mashed potato flakes is more exciting than watching him sing. The judges really made it sting in Alexis' pussy bone by saying they were considering saving her ass with that golden power of veto trash (wait, that's Big Brother). They made Alexis sing for her liiiiiiiifffffeee, but after all that shit, they said it was good, but not good enough. Bye, bye! This is what I hate about the judges making them sing again. If it was bad enough the first to time to land them in the bottom, why would they torture us again?! They should make them do something else. Like, I don't know, compete in a round of Are You Smarter Than A Crazy? starring Paula Abdul . Alexis' exit means that the rumor about the final 4 being fixed was built on lies. Unless, American Idol tried to be all slick by quitting that bitch, thinking that would throw us off. Alexis had to be sacrificed. Eh, at least I won't have to look at her HGTV hair anymore. | |
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