The latest from Dlisted - Be Very Afraid
| Kristen Stewart Or Some Random Smackhead? | Top |
| While I will never co-sign Kristen Stewart as Joan Jett in The Runaways biopic, I will say that this new " dyke on smack" mullet does wonders for her. It really accentuates the giant bags under her eyes and makes her veins really pop. I bet it looks really hot when she gets the shakes. I feel like I could lay down with her on the hood of her El Camino parked in front of her double-wide. We'd share a Rum & Tab while discussing the meaning of Journey songs. | |
| Fishy Is One Of Those People | Top |
| In the newest edition of Bowel Movement Weekly , Fishsticks Paltrow writes about a delightful cookie her good friends Katie Lee and William Joel - let's stop there. Yes, she called BILLY Joel " William ." Ugh. Fishy totally calls Katie " Lady Katherine Lee, " but decided that would be too much for us regular people to understand. Fishy probably calls everyone by their birth name. You know she calls her husband " Christopher Anthony." Christopher Anthony also has to greet her every time by gently kissing her hand while she curtsies. This bitch has been in way too many period pieces. It messed up her head. And why is Fishsticks writing about cookies anyway? Out of all the things she could fuck with she chooses cookies! Only Fishsticks could make a cookie sound like a major asshole. "I adore the contrast of the dark chocolate and the cherries – heaven. " That cookie is a pretentious snob! If I tried to eat it, it would raise its chip at me. Good going, Fishy. You ruined cookies. | |
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