The latest from Dlisted - Be Very Afraid
| This Is Real Life | Top |
| Window licker Kristen Stewart and Dakota Fanning left a recording studio in Los Angeles yesterday where they were beginning vocal work on The Runaways biopic. This isn't just a day terror you can snap out of. This is really happening. Kristen is Joan Jett, Dakota is Cherie Currie, CoCo is Lita Ford and Phoebe Price is Sandy West. No, that would have saved this soon-to-be epic mess. Alessandra Torresani is going to be Lita Ford and Stella Maeve is Sandy West. Unfortunately, the cast doesn't include the role of a bear who mauls all of them at the beginning of the movie and saves us all! Every time I see pictures of Dakota Fanning, it always feels like she's reading my mind. She kind of makes my palms sweaty, but I've always liked her. She isn't a fuck-up and her acting doesn't make me go cross-eyed. It's that Kristen Stewart ho I have a problem with! The half-eaten Hot Pocket sitting next to me would make a better Joan Jett. They are going to have to stick a taser in Kristen's ass just to get a little raw emotion out of her! Dyeing your hair black and taking a pair of scissors to it doesn't make you a believable Joan Jett! I already tried that shit in junior high school and it didn't work. | |
| Jessica Alba Didn't Think This Through | Top |
| While MiserAlba was in Oklahoma City shooting The Killer Inside Me , she decided to spend her off hours saving the sharks by fucking up other people's property! You know, because it's widely known that Oklahoma City is a popular summer vacation spots for sharks. The Lost Ogle says that last week MiserAlba pasted shark posters all over Downtown Oklahoma City as a way to raise awareness to the shrinking population of Great Whites. The problem is that there was no kind of information on the poster. It's just a poster of a Great White that she probably bought at the swap meet. This looks more like a gorilla marketing campaign for Mega Shark vs. Giant Octopus . Now that would've been brilliant. There's also another problem. MiserAlba covered up a billboard for United Way. The United Way told TMZ that they will probably have to pay to get the billboard replaced. My favorite part is how she looks all proud of herself! She's like " Yay me !" I mean, she's even SMILING really big. She probably bought herself a cupcake afterwards for a job well done. And don't even accuse MiserAlba of not knowing anything about sharks. She was in Into the Blue after all and there were sharks in that movie. Duh. You know the sharks are down in the ocean pasting posters of MiserAlba's angry face with the text, " You aren't helping " written on it. UPDATE: MiserAlba issued an " I'm sowwy " statement to TMZ , but she kind of just blamed the shark people for leading her to vandalism: " I got involved in something I should have had no part of. I realize that I should have used better judgment and I regret not thinking things through before I made spontaneous and ill-advised decision to let myself get involved with the people behind this campaign. I sincerely apologize to the citizens of Oklahoma City and to the United Way for my involvement in this incident." | |
CREATE MORE ALERTS:
Auctions - Find out when new auctions are posted
Horoscopes - Receive your daily horoscope
Music - Get the newest Album Releases, Playlists and more
News - Only the news you want, delivered!
Stocks - Stay connected to the market with price quotes and more
Weather - Get today's weather conditions
| You received this email because you subscribed to Yahoo! Alerts. Use this link to unsubscribe from this alert. To change your communications preferences for other Yahoo! business lines, please visit your Marketing Preferences. To learn more about Yahoo!'s use of personal information, including the use of web beacons in HTML-based email, please read our Privacy Policy. Yahoo! is located at 701 First Avenue, Sunnyvale, CA 94089. |
No comments:
Post a Comment