The latest from Dlisted - Be Very Afraid
- Nobody Likes Fishy :(
- Open Post: Hosted By Naomi Campbell's Hot Moves
- Tyler Durden To Take On Sherlock Holmes?
- Take That, OctoMom!
| Nobody Likes Fishy :( | Top |
| The giant cloud blocking everyone's sunshine on the set of Iron Man 2 was not ScarJo's gigantic chichi balls. No, apparently, Fishsticks Paltrow is the one who brought everyone down. A little while ago, I wrote some post about how Fishy and ScarJo didn't exchange friendship bracelets or become blood sisters while working together. Fox411 is now co-signing that rumor and adding that even the crew scurried like roaches every time the GOOP QUEEN entered the building. A source said, " Gwyneth is extremely cool at work. She's just a step above professional, too snobby. Gwyneth is not friendly to anyone, and tends to make people feel awkward and uncomfortable. She wasn't outright rude to Scarlett, she just didn't ever speak to her. Gwyneth went out of her way to avoid Scarlett, and they had zero contact, at Gwyneth's choosing ." Fishy must be a real yeast infection of a person, because the crew liked hanging out with her dirty tampon husband instead! The source went on to yap, " Much of the crew didn't mind hanging out with her husband, Chris, but if Gwyneth ever came around, they scattered! Chris is so chill and relaxed and she is just the opposite. Chris has been a crew favorite since the filming of the first movie. " In Fishy's defense, she didn't talk to Mrs. Ryan Reynolds, because ScarJo's tittays are fatty and filled with cholesterol. Fishy only surrounds herself with natural healthiness. And I know these " Fishy is annoying " stories are a dime a dozen, but I really can't get enough of them. I can totally picture the crew having a zillion laughs with ScarJo when all of a sudden Fishy slithers into the room causing everyone to come down with the dry shits and cotton mouth. Bitch really knows how to eff up your bowel movements. | |
| Open Post: Hosted By Naomi Campbell's Hot Moves | Top |
| You know shit must be good in Naomi Campbell's life if she's actually smiling AND dancing. Homegirl usually only breaks a sweat when she's busting a bitch in the face. But you know, we'd all be dancing for joy too if we were sexing on a big bag of money. Here's more of Naomi doing the " My Pussay is Cashin' In Big " dance while partying at the VIP Room in St. Tropez a couple of nights ago with her boyfriend Vladislav Doronin . WARNING: If you click on one of the first four thumbnails, Naomi's ashy crotch goiter may punch you in the eye. Make sure your insurance policy covers such incidents before you click. | |
| Tyler Durden To Take On Sherlock Holmes? | Top |
| Guy Ritchie's Sherlock Homeboy: The Hunt for Jude Law's Next Baby Mama has wrapped up principal photography and is due out this Christmas, but The Mirror claims shit is about to change in a major way. According to sources, Warner Bros. wasn't exactly blowing jizz bombs over the final cut and has demanded that Guy fix it pronto. They want Guy to re-shoot some scenes and add Sherlock's arch rival, the evil Professor Moriarty , to the movie. After being scolded by mommy and daddy, Guy immediately asked his old Snatch friend Brad Pitt to step in as Moriarty. Luckily for Guy, Brad has an open spot in his schedule and is available for the re-shoots. Brad has already arrived in London and will soon begin shooting. A source said, "It was an oversight in the film not to make a bigger deal about Moriarty. He is mentioned as Holmes' arch enemy, but the bosses wanted Guy to make more of him. Jude Law and Robert Downey Jr have already shot their scenes. But now that 10 extra days have been added to shoot the new ones, they may be called back for a day or two ." Because of all the changes, the movie won't open this Christmas and has been pushed into 2010. Why bother with Benjamin Button's?! I recently read that Guy wanted to explore Sherlock and Watson's homoerotic relationship in this movie, so he could've just added a good old-fashioned ass-to-mouth scene at the end to sell more tickets. Nothing puts hos in seats like gay porn. Besides, I always felt that Watson's face should be covered in man gravy when Sherlock delivers his signature line: " Elementary, my dear Watson ." Just pretend that made sense. UPDATE : Well, fuck. A spokeswhore for Warner Bros. says this lies. They issued this statement to UsWeekly: " The report in today's London Mirror is completely inaccurate. Brad Pitt is not joining the cast of Sherlock Holmes and we're extremely pleased with the production of the film. As planned, it will be released on Christmas Day, 2009. In order to complete the movie, we've scheduled a few days on set to shoot a couple of additional scenes, obtain pick-up shots, and perfect some of the visual effects elements, all of which is standard filmmaking practice ." | |
| Take That, OctoMom! | Top |
| This news is going to make OctoMommy swallow a fertility clinic whole, because bitch is going to have to step up her baby game. The Sun says that a woman in Tunisia is about to turn her snatch into a popcorn machine by giving birth to 12 BABIES!!!!! And if you just queefed, that was your uterus dry heaving. Doctor confirmed that the human baby machine's instant child army will consist of six boys and six girls. The woman conceived the babies after going through a series of fertility treatments. The soon-to-be DodecaMommy wants to give birth naturally, but doctors have told her that her pussy will literally explode. That's exactly what he said, the doctor said, " Mam, I am a doctor and my medical expertise tells me that your pussy will explode. Literally. " Not to mention, that if she turns her vag tunnel into a water slide, Raging Waters will file a copyright infringement lawsuit against her. The father of the babies told the press, " In the beginning, we thought that my wife would give birth to twins, but more fetuses were discovered. Our joy increased with the growing number ." Yeah, as they were crying tears of joy, her lady parts were crying tears of pain. If Miss Clown Car Conductor is wondering why there's a white flag sticking out of her vagina, somebody should tell her that it's her uterus begging for MERCY. | |
CREATE MORE ALERTS:
Auctions - Find out when new auctions are posted
Horoscopes - Receive your daily horoscope
Music - Get the newest Album Releases, Playlists and more
News - Only the news you want, delivered!
Stocks - Stay connected to the market with price quotes and more
Weather - Get today's weather conditions
| You received this email because you subscribed to Yahoo! Alerts. Use this link to unsubscribe from this alert. To change your communications preferences for other Yahoo! business lines, please visit your Marketing Preferences. To learn more about Yahoo!'s use of personal information, including the use of web beacons in HTML-based email, please read our Privacy Policy. Yahoo! is located at 701 First Avenue, Sunnyvale, CA 94089. |
No comments:
Post a Comment