The latest from Dlisted - Be Very Afraid
| Wherefore Art Thou, Rojo? | Top |
| When I first read Cynthia Nixon's name on the list of celebrities attending the White House Correspondents' Dinner, I immediately rubbed a layer of SPF 10 million over my eyes to prepare them for the vision of the glorious Rojo Caliente in a custom made white tuxedo from the GOD collection at Men's Warehouse. Well, I nearly blinded myself for no reason, because it doesn't look like Rojo Caliente was even there. Oh, Rojo continues to elude me like proper grammar. Doesn't Rojo know that Obama only agreed to show up because he wanted to witness her beauty for himself? Sigh. Even though Rojo was not there to dazzle Obama's soul, he still managed to perform. Here he is throwing ZINGS and SNAPS left and fucking right: And here's some celebrities who were invited to last night's dinner for whatever reason. Don't ask me how some (Michelle Obama and Betty White not included) of these hos got an invitation. Most of them don't even belong at the White Castle Correspondents' Dinner let alone the White House Correspondents' Dinner. In order: a future People Magazine " I'm a lesbian " cover fetus, some drag queen, Jessica Simpson with Gabourey Sidibe , Patricia Arquette (looking dreadful) with Wendie Malick (ditto) , the Jonas Brothers, Donatella Versace , ScarJo with her twin brother, the Tasmanian Devil , MiserAlba with her husband, BETTY WHITE and Michelle Obama . | |
| The Rose Of The Kentucky Derby | Top |
| It wouldn't be the Kentucky Derby without a tall crystal glass of sweet tea with just a hint of mint to give your tongue the tingles. Johnny Weir quenched the thirst of dry mouthed bitches when he hit the red carpet at the Kentucky Derby yesterday dressed like a fancy Bravo reality star (I'm looking at you, Dwight ) going to a drag queen's funeral. This is the first time in the history of the Kentucky Derby that the race ended early and a winner was not declared. That's because as soon all the horses spotted Johnny in the audience, they sprouted wings, pushed a crystal horn out of their heads and flew off towards the land of rainbows and glitter. Johnny freed them! And the people who got to witness Johnny's glittery magic at work were: two assholian clowns, Larry Birkhead with Dannielynn, Fran Drescher, Joey Fat One, Jeff Lewis with Jenni , Vanessa Manilafolders with Nick Lachey, LOCKE! , Ugh Mario Lopez , Marisa Miller , Rebecca Romijn with Jerry O'Connell, Fred Willard and the woman with the best hat at the Derby. | |
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