The latest from Dlisted - Be Very Afraid
- Leslie Carter Has Passed Away At The Age Of 25
- Don Cornelius Has Passed Away
- The CAPTION THIS Contest WINNER For January 31st!
- Hot Slut Of The Day!
- Birthday Sluts
- Afternoon Crumbs
- One Reason To Love Reese Witherspoon
- Harry Potter Prefers A Hairy Twatter
- Open Post: Hosted By Kristen Bell's Sloth-Induced Meltdown
- Stop Me If You've Heard This Before
| Leslie Carter Has Passed Away At The Age Of 25 | Top |
Two R.I.P. posts in a row and it's not even noon. Grab a few bottles of Strawberry Hill, bring a fully stocked bong and pull the blanket over February. Aaron and Nick Carter's sister, Leslie Carter (in the middle), died yesterday in upstate New York and that's pretty much all we know. The Carter family released a statement to Access Hollywood, but they're keeping the cause of Leslie's death to themselves for now. "Our family is grieving right now and it's a private matter. We are deeply saddened for the loss of our beloved sister, daughter, and granddaughter, Leslie Carter. We request the utmost privacy during this difficult time." Like Aaron and Nick, Leslie was a singer and had a song called "Like Wow" on the Shrek soundtrack. Leslie was also in the family's mess of a reality show The House of Carters. She married her husband Mike in 2008 and gave birth to their daughter Alyssa Jane on April 1, 2011. | |
| Don Cornelius Has Passed Away | Top |
It's one thing to wake up to the news that Don Cornelius has strut up to heaven at the age of 75, but it's another hearing that you got there after he apparently committed suicide. And on the first day of Black History Month. Damn. Damn. Damn. TMZ says that police were called to Don's home in Sherman Oaks, CA early this morning after he allegedly shot himself in the head. Don was shortly pronounced dead at the hospital. Don's family hasn't confirmed any of this and an investigation into the cause of his death is happening right now. Don was apparently in a sad and sick way after divorcing his wife in 2009. Before the judge granted the divorce, Don told the court that he was suffering from major health problems and wanted the divorce behind him before he died. During the past few years, Don had a stroke and had to undergo brain surgery. Don created Soul Train in 1970, because he wanted to give soul music a wider audience and there was nothing like it on TV. Soul Train moved to syndication in 1971 and throughout the years James Brown, Michael Jackson and Aretha Franklin all performed on it. Rosie Perez, Pebbles, Jody Watley, MC Hammer and Nick Cannon all got their start shaking their shit on Soul Train. Soul Train aired over 1,000 episodes and ended in 2006. Rest in peace, Don. And as Don used to sign off every Soul Train with: "As always in parting, we wish you love, peace and soul!" Don is with the angels now doing THIS: | |
| The CAPTION THIS Contest WINNER For January 31st! | Top |
Neither snow, nor sleet, nor lack of brains will will keep us from our deliveries to Charlie Sheen. - Rocket Runners-up: George Clooney's unemployment line. - tonicbitch via Poorly Dressed | |
| Hot Slut Of The Day! | Top |
| They're taking our jobs! They're outsourcing to dogs now! But honestly, this labrador, or golden retriever, or Marley & Me dog, or overgrown beagle dog, or whatever she is (all big dogs look the same to me - NO RACIST) is a really dog secretary. Oh sorry, I mean a really good junior administrative assistant dog. This dog is serious about the job and gets it done fast. If this was you or me, we'd take ten times as long to even pick that paper up off the printer. Truth. While waiting for it to print, we'd walk to the back, grab a Cactus Cooler out of the refrigerator and then talk to one of the vet assistants about how Sarah Michelle Gellar's wig on Ringer last night looked so thirsty and busted that not even a desperate chicken would lay an egg on that ugly shit. We'd eventually make our way to the front, grab the paper, look at it like it means something to us and immediately get distracted by all those pictures taped to the side. We'd ask the other assistant, "I haven't seen these before. Is that your daughter? She has your hair. Oh, that's not your daughter. Are you sure? You should call Maury. (crickets)." Finally after all that, we'd hand the receipt over to the customer but not before telling him, "Oh, shit. I loved your mom in Mermaids! Did you get that new dick yet?" So yeah, this dog is doing a better job than you, me and everybody else. She should get DOGPLOYEE OF THE YEAR! via Reddit (For Kane) | |
| Birthday Sluts | Top |
Sherilyn Fenn (47) | |
| Afternoon Crumbs | Top |
The demure Italian blossom that is Elisabetta Canalis has gone from George Clooney to Eggs from True Blood to Steve-O. So if you were ever in an episode of Jersey Shore or were arrested in front of the Cops cameras once, then you're in luck, because it won't be long before Elisabetta downgrades down to your ass for paparazzi attention! - The Superficial Jennifer Lawrence and the little boy from About A Boy are totally a thing - Lainey Gossip In possibly related news, Jesus just announced that he's converting to Buddhism - Celebitchy Sophie Monk's face looks like it's made of watercolors - Hollywood Tuna This isn't going to scrub the gay out of him, but rubbing all that dead skin off is going to give this dude GLOWING skin - Towleroad Mini Anden's nipple does Bazaar - (NSFW) Drunken Stepfather Lily Collins loves her five layer eyebrow situation - ICYDK In "same ole, same ole" news, Ashley Jizzdale looks a mess - Popoholic BREAKING: Seal is still wearing his wedding ring and still dressing like it's 1999 - Just Jared Why does JLo have furry baseball bats on her coat? - Popsugar Here I am writing a Dlisted post - The Berry Three words that might make your night: ROYAL MARINE PEEN - (NSFW) OMG Blog They're trying to tell me that's Tami Roman, but it looks more like a wax-covered Predator in a weave to me - Crunk + Disorderly Dear Bulldog, please leave the acrobatic art of boxing to the professionals (aka Maru) - Cityrag Miley Cyrus busted her ass - Celebslam And I think I just busted my ass after falling back while picturing Rosie O'Donnell romancing her girlfriend with a turkey baster - I'm Not Obsessed I think I see moose knuckle - SOW | |
| One Reason To Love Reese Witherspoon | Top |
| Reese Witherspoon hasn't meant shit to me ever since she stomped her chin on Jake Gyllenhaal's fairytale wedding dreams, but she has redeemed herself by making the children cry. MTV (via Just Jared) asked Reese what she thinks about Justin Bieber remaking Fear and she could've let out some sugar coated publicist-approved bullshit, but instead she said this: "Fine. Great. That would be cool. Would he be playing me or is he playing Mark Wahlberg?" DONE. Reese then tried to make it sound like what she really meant is that he'll play a dude with a girl stalker, but CHIN please. Oh, Reese, when you're fighting off the rattle-wielding, mouth foaming Beliebers with your chin, just know that you're everyone's hero via The Superficial | |
| Harry Potter Prefers A Hairy Twatter | Top |
Doesn't it seem like just yesterday the media was asking a young Daniel Radcliffe what kind of Legos he likes to play with (or whatever) and now the media is asking him about how he likes his coochie. They grow up so fast. DanRad and Heat Magazine (via Entertainmentwise) were talking about how he let his Jewish peen bush be great in Equus and that somehow led to him confessing that if he's not pulling pubes off his tongue, he's not messing with it: "This is way too much information, but I don't like girls with nothing down there either. It freaks me out. You have to have something, otherwise it's fucking creepy," And now we know that DanRad has licked on a hairless skin mitten and it was creepy to his ass because it was like sucking on a hairless armadillo's armpit or giving a raspberry to a plate of dried mangos. THANKS, Harry Potter. But I'm with him. Genital shrubs are there for a reason. It gives you something to look at while you're down there and it sometimes protects your nose. What if you're really getting into it and you accidentally scrape your nose on their crotch stubble. It can happen! A good day would be not having to explain to people that the scratch on your nose is from rubbing up against the stubble patch on your piece's crotch. | |
| Open Post: Hosted By Kristen Bell's Sloth-Induced Meltdown | Top |
| Like Jennifer Aniston when Justin Theroux seriously asked her out on a date without saying PSYCH! afterward, Kristen Bell was filled so much potent happiness over meeting a sloth that she melted into a puddle of joy before the sloth drank her up with a straw (that'd probably make her life). Seriously, Veronica Mars showed Ellen a clip (skip to the 2:00 mark) of her having a melodramatic meltdown after her piece Dax Shepard introduced her to a sloth on her birthday. OVER A SLOTH! It's not like the sloth sang her a Stacey Q song or brought her a plate of Chocodiles (Why don't they make Chocodiles anymore?). It was just a sloth being a sloth. Veronica Mars is fucking crazy. Although, if you woke up next to Dax's face every morning, you too would be so vulnerable that your raw emotions would spin out of control at the drop of a SLOTH. This is your "crying over cat videos while on your period" moment on speed. And I'm totally changing Birthday Sluts to Birthday Sloths. | |
| Stop Me If You've Heard This Before | Top |
Water is wet, I flicked at my nipple while using the neti pot this morning, Tommy Girl took his toast with a thick layer of nut butter and Lindsay Lohan allegedly snorted her way to fucked up and back on Sunday night. The headline "Lindsay Lohan Gets Loaded at Chateau Marmont" is about as shocking as the headline "Angelina Jolie Only Ate Air Today," but let's hear what Radar has to say about this mess anyway. Radar's source claims that at a SAG Awards party at Chateau Marmont on Sunday night, Blohan slurred her words and her eyes were so damn glassy that you could've cut a line on them. Apparently, she tried to look like the epitome of sober by only sipping on water, but her coke burnt nose told a different story. So said the source: "Lindsay was spotted going to the restroom with a male companion on numerous occasions in a short amount of time. When the two of them emerged from the bathroom, Lindsay was giggling and her nose appeared red. Lindsay was spotted only drinking water in the lounge area, but she appeared to be loaded on something, and she seemed under the influence. Lindsay's eyes were glassy and her pupils were constricted. [She] was definitely on something. She was slurring her words, and needed help walking at one point in the course of the night. Lindsay was sitting on a chair adjacent to Harvey Weinstein's party - his was roped off and she didn't get past the rope. So she sat on the other side looking over. She looked bedraggled and desperate." Of course, LiLo's rep denies all of this. The only language Lindsay Lohan knows is Drunk Slur and her pupils are just naturally constricted now, so it would really be news if she was talking without a slur and walking without tripping over herself. But I CAN'T with her hibernating in the bathroom all night. Who does she think she is? Kim Richards from The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills? I hate that shit. That is why going to certain places is the worst. There's always some cokehead cokejacking the bathroom when all you want to do is take a quick caca, because you made the wrong decision of drinking a White Russian. You know how some bathrooms have a baby changing station? Chateau Marmont needs a coke snorting station just for Blohan. Let the non-snorters shit! | |
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