The latest from Dlisted - Be Very Afraid
| Fergie Blames It On The Booze | Top |
| You know that video of the original Fergie pushing her ex-husband Prince Andrew out on the ho stroll and then negotiating with johns for a piece of his ass? Well, Fergie tells Oprah that she was drunk and splayed out in the gutter at the time she was caught trying to whore out business access to Prince Andrew for $750,000. Basically, Fergie is saying she was broke, boozed and desperate. Don't ask me how this is different from Fergie's usual state, but we'll let her serve us this shit for now. Just put your napkin on your lap and pretend like you've never seen this dish before. Fergie, who hasn't seen the tape yet, told Gayle's scissor sister, " I haven't faced the devil in the face, because I was in the gutter at the moment. I'm aware of the fact that I've been drinking, you know, that I was not in my right place. " A source tells UsWeekly that nobody was shocked by the tape, because Fergie is broke and spends all the money she doesn't have on fancy clothes. Once again the sweet nectar takes the fall! If Fergie wants to play the pimp game, she needs to embrace the part. Just grab your cane, stroke your feather and keep on, keep on. There's no shame in whoring out your loved ones for a shiny coin. Just ask Billy Ray Cyrus, White Oprah, Papa Joe, etc..etc..! And apparently Queen Elizabeth is looking for a raise , so don't be surprised if you see her on tape trying to sell off her loved ones to the highest bidder. Raise that white gloved pimp hand, Queen! | |
| The CAPTION THIS Contest WINNER For May 28th! | Top |
| Chaz Bono claims it was love at first sight, the second he looked into John Goodman's eyes. Soultonic Runners-up: The infamous Billy Ray and Miley shot, prior to Photoshopping - Emeriesan Sandra found photographic evidence that not all vanilla gorillas and their daddies are involved in abusive relationships. - SarahR . Life can be so funny. For instance, one day you can be innocently tapping your toes in the men's highway rest stop, and the next you are sitting for a "Your Ass Belongs To Me Now" bear on bear photo shoot. - SarahR . Image by Von Swank via Picture is Unrelated | |
| Hot Slut Of The Day! | Top |
| Ugly Bertie , the " ugliest cat in Great Britain " - 8-year-old Ugly Bertie is looking for a home today after the Royal Society for the Prevention of Cruelty to Animals picked his mangy ass up last week. When they found him, his fur was matted down like Kirstie Alley's taint bush, so they had to shave most of his hair off. Kathy Kay of the RSPCA said they named him " Ugly Bertie" for obvious reasons. The rude bitch said, " Have you ever seen an uglier cat than that? (Ed note: Cut to Ugly Bat Boy throwing shade) We keep looking at him and laughing – but, at the same time, we feel really sorry for him. He's either been abandoned or got lost. Persians aren't the sort of cats that can groom themselves. He'll probably be a very attractive cat when his hair grows back and he gets himself sorted ." Despite looking like Billy Goat Brad's minge, Ugly Bertie is perfectly healthy. And Kerry Katona is about to sue a bitch, because she worked really hard at being named Great Britain's ugliest pussy. Ugly Bertie better watch it. | |
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