The latest from Dlisted - Be Very Afraid
- The CAPTION THIS Contest For March 28th!
- Ina Garten Will Grant A Sick Child's Wish After All
- Open Post: Hosted By Mimi's Baby Butterfly Ball
| The CAPTION THIS Contest For March 28th! | Top |
| via Break.com | |
| Ina Garten Will Grant A Sick Child's Wish After All | Top |
| Freddy Krueger was about to declare his obsession for oversized denim shirts, the Hamptons, lemonade cocktails and dick just so he could get closer to the Baresoul Cuntessa and learn how to crush the dreams of terminally ill children from THE MASTER! But Freddy can cancel his plans now, because Ina Garten tells The Los Angeles Times that she will find time in her OMGSOBUSY schedule to hang out with 6-year-old Enzo . Ina's people (aka Flotsam and Jetsam) turned down the Make-A-Wish Foundation TWICE when the charity let them know that a boy with leukemia wanted to cook a meal with her. But Ina swears on the pact she signed with the devil that the request never passed her desk (made of kitten bones). Ina's people turned it down without her knowing and now she's upset about all the hate that is raining down on her. Ina only found out about Enzo's wish this past Friday when TMZ posted it. Ina jumped on her demon mobile, backpedaled into her publicist's office and told him to issue this statement: "She contributes both personally and financially on a regular basis to numerous causes, including to Make-A-Wish Foundation. Sadly, it's of course not possible to do them all. Throughout her life, Ina has contributed generously to all kinds of important efforts and she will continue to do so." Enzo's family also posted a " LEAVE INA ALOOOONE " post on their website and asked everybody to let go. Ina also said that she's going to call Enzo soon and invite him to the Food Network studios in NYC to cook with her. And when he gets there, Ina is going to waddle out in a dolphin carcass coat and tell little Enzo that she just wanted to say NO to his face! Then she'll lick up the tears coming down his cheeks and cackle into the night! No, no, no. Ina won't do that. This was all just a misunderstanding! A misunderstanding that strangely smells like bottom shelf vodka, packaged shredded cheese, microwave brownie batter and minimal effort. Hmmm. Sandra Lee WOULDN'T! Would she? | |
| Open Post: Hosted By Mimi's Baby Butterfly Ball | Top |
| The birth of Unicornariah Twinkle Sprite and Lambow Brite Nickamante almost happened on Mariah Carey's born day this weekend when she had early contractions, but it turned out to be a false alarm. This is a sparkly rainbow of good news for all of us! Because if Mimi's twin babies were born, we would've never gotten a picture of the Color Me Mine bump she Tweeted along with this message: My attempt @ festiveness on 327! For ATLITL thank u + I♥U! Comin soon #dembabies! LYMA+thanx 4 making me happy:) http://twitpic.com/4ebbbm about 3 hours ago via Twitpic Retweeted by 100+ people Does anybody know of an 8-year-old Lisa Frank character who can translate that for us? Mimi's twins really aren't going to come out now. They're staring at the hermaphrodite butterfly from the other side of her belly and realizing that a future of dressing like Care Bear candy ravers is about to begin. On a positive note, I'm sure their five-octave cries will shatter the sequined bunny ears she puts on their heads. So there's that! | |
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