The latest from Dlisted - Be Very Afraid
- The CAPTION THIS Contest For May 3rd!
- Because There Can Only Be One Shauna (Sand) Lamas!
- Open Post: Hosted By Man-On-Man Love
| The CAPTION THIS Contest For May 3rd! | Top |
| via Break | |
| Because There Can Only Be One Shauna (Sand) Lamas! | Top |
| Lorenzo Lamas kept holy matrimony spinning in its grave over the weekend when he made 24-year-old Shawna Craig his 5th wife and future ex-wife in Cabo San Lucas, Mexico. Like every thing that penetrates through the lucite bubble that covers Shauna Sand , the name " Lamas " does not want to leave her and will stay on as her legal last name. The constitution (and the laws of the gods) CLEARLY state that there can only be one Shauna Lamas existing in the 50, so this Shawna Craig trick has to keep her last name! BUT WAIT! A different idea has slithered into one of the pockmark's on Lorenzo's face and crawled up into his brain. Lorenzo will take Shawna's last name instead. Presenting Lorenzo Lamas-Craig! Lorenzo's manager tells E! News that he's proud to become the first celebrity (?) to do such a thing! Such a fucking pioneer, that Lorenzo. "He's going to legally change his name to Lorenzo Lamas-Craig. He's always thinking outside the box so he decided to become the first celebrity to take his wife's last name. His new wife didn't want to be called Shawna Lamas for obvious reasons." Lorenzo Lamas is as crazy as his face is beat if he really thinks I'm going to call him Lorenzo Lamas-Craig. Typing and saying those extra syllables are just a waste of time. Time I can spend finding the 12-year-old slut from the 1980s that Shawna Craig snatched that half-sweater from. Besides, this marriage is going to last about as long as the will of a mortal man when he stares into the angelic eyes of the Empress of Lucite, so he'll be Lorenzo Lamas again in a quick minute. Here's Lorenzo Lamas and his toddler bride Shawna Craig being greeted at LAX by a young child actor they totally hired from central casting. This really does count as an act of child abuse. | |
| Open Post: Hosted By Man-On-Man Love | Top |
| Two men holding a piece of meat while touching lips and trying to keep their stuffed crotch pouches from exploding at a Lakers' game sounds much hotter on paper, but I'll still take it. Especially since John C. Reilly has a sweet twinkle in his eye like he's hoping Will Ferrell will open an eye and give him the signal that it's okay to give a little tip of the tongue. | |
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