The latest from Dlisted - Be Very Afraid
- Even In Death, Elizabeth Taylor Still Knows How To Make An Entrance
- The CAPTION THIS Contest WINNER For March 24th!
- Hot Slut Of The Day!
| Even In Death, Elizabeth Taylor Still Knows How To Make An Entrance | Top |
| Elizabeth Taylor was laid to rest in her $11,000 coffin (sadly, it's not diamond encrusted) yesterday and she delivered one last act of glamour before everybody said their final goodbyes. A small group of Liz's family and friends arrived at Forest Lawn Memorial Park in Glendale, Calif. and waited for 15 minutes until she was carried in. Elizabeth's rep told People that she wanted to be late to her own funeral. That's right. A true queen of glamour always keeps her subjects waiting. I was hoping that an army of shirtless hunks wearing pharaoh costumes carried Liz in as albino children tossed rhinestone-covered white rose petals down the aisle, but she kept things simple. La Liz's casket was covered with gardenias, violets, and lily of the valley. Rabbi Jerry Cutler officiated the funeral which included a spot of total WTF randomness. Apparently, Elizabeth counted Colin Farrell as one of best friends forever and so he read a poem by Gerard Manley Hopkins during the service. No farewell waltz from Kathy Ireland ? No smoldering silent soliloquy from Tom Ryan ? But a poem reading from COLIN FARRELL of all hos?! How did that happen? Fuck hearing about the details of how an icy fairy turned Anderson's Cooper hair silver with the touch of a crystal wand! This is the back story I really want to hear (I don't mean that). I bet that at the end of the funeral, Colin pulled two greasy gold rings off of his ears and gently tossed them into her coffin before saying, " These have always brought me luck. " Someone had to do it. | |
| The CAPTION THIS Contest WINNER For March 24th! | Top |
| These green-minded dudes have found a way to recycle one of Milton Berle's condoms. - OurMissC Runners-up: Preview from MTV's new show, "Jacksonville Shore" - kims_wig You see this, Oksana? Look how peaceful things are when everyone gets blown BEFORE jacuzzi. - perky Just add salt, and John Travolta's soup is ready to eat - griffin73 via Break | |
| Hot Slut Of The Day! | Top |
| Lakita Evans , the creator and owner of Fat Ho Burgers in Waco, Texas. 23-year-old Lakita worked her way through college just so she could erect a Fat Ho in Waco, but not everybody's embracing this particular Fat Ho with their arms and mouths. Who doesn't love a Fat Ho? Well, apparently a nearby Christian cafe as well as other members of the community don't! They think the name is misogynistic, tacky and trashy. But Fat Ho's mama, Miss Lakita, says the name is just some tongue-in-cheek shit and she's not calling anyone a ho! Miss Lakita explains the Fat Ho in the town like this : " It's not calling people a ho. It's just like they say, 'Oooh that ho is big,' or, 'That ho is tight!'. Look what's going on in Japan. It's like clear this world is not gonna get any better. Why cry and be depressed. The economy is bad. Somebody gotta keep a sense of humor around here. " And there's my explanation for Hot Slut. The world is ending, so why not laugh about the Fat Ho and the Hot Slut as the planet collapses on top of us. Fat Ho gets extra credit points for having a " Tiny Ho" children's meal on their menu and for not painting over the mural left there by its previous tenant: a Mexican restaurant. Here's the Ballad of the Fat Ho from MyFoxDNW . Bob's Big Boy just found his new side piece. Watch the latest video at video.foxnews.com Now I know where I'm having my wedding, divorce and funeral receptions! Here's hoping the Fat Ho gets fatter and ho-ier, so that Lakita can expand her brand by opening up the Skinny Skeeza Juice Bar and the Bukkake Skank Ice Cream Parlor. | |
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