The latest from Dlisted - Be Very Afraid
- The CAPTION THIS Contest For April 26th!
- Katie Couric: "I Quit This Bitch. Officially."
- Open Post: Hosted By My Future (Hopefully)
- Kunty Karl Eats With His Nose
| The CAPTION THIS Contest For April 26th! | Top |
| via Picture is Unrelated | |
| Katie Couric: "I Quit This Bitch. Officially." | Top |
| The Alaskan wilderness better go on high alert, because this news is going to make Sarah Palin want to hump a moose (before she shoots it in the face, of course). Katie Couric gave People the news that is shocking to absolutely no one. "I have decided to step down from the CBS Evening News. "I'm really proud of the talented team on the CBS Evening News and the award-winning work we've been able to do in the past five years in addition to the reporting I've done for 60 Minutes and CBS Sunday Morning. In making the decision to move on, I know the Evening News will be in great hands, but I am excited about the future. I am looking at a format that will allow me to engage in more multi-dimensional storytelling. The bottom line is that I love doing all kinds of different stories. I have a lot of areas of interest and I want to be able to fulfill all of that." CBS has yet to announce Katie's replacement, but airing the final season of the Shiba Inu Cam instead of the Nightly News wouldn't be a bad move. Or they could just air this GIF on a continuous loop. Yeah, do that. | |
| Open Post: Hosted By My Future (Hopefully) | Top |
| When I finally retire from being a professional drunk hater, I really hope that like ole' girl here, I can spend my better days bringing the party to the pool areas of various Central Florida (or wherever the hell this is) resorts. When I'm not passed out in a puddle of slobber and wine cooler that didn't make it down all the way, I'll slip on my purple floral Speedo and let my fupa lead me to an absolutely random and bizarre hip hop pool party where nobody is dancing. I'll bless the sky with my ass before blessing the pavement with that same ass. Not giving a fuck is living the life! via Buzzfeed | |
| Kunty Karl Eats With His Nose | Top |
| In order to fit into a pair of -10 jeans, Karl Lagerfeld's entire digestive system was removed, so now he gets his nutrients from feeding off of the gasps the audience at his fashion shows make when he sends a $3,000 cob web tunic down the runway. And he also gets life when he listens to the remaining fat on a model eating away at itself after she snorts a line of the bad shit. So because of this, I thought it was a little crotch-scratching strange when Magnum ice cream hired Karl to direct their commercial starring Rachel Bilson . I used to think that Karl Lagerfeld and ice cream went together like Donald Trump and common sense. But Kunty Karl tells W Magazine that he's actually a perfect fit since his father was a milkman of sorts and he looooooves chocolate even if it never passes through his zombie lips. So why ice cream? Don't forget my father was a milkman. He produced Carnation milk in Europe under different names, so I like to say he was a milkman. And ice cream is made with milk, no? Do you eat it? I would love to if I was allowed to eat sugar, but my doctor told me that sugar wasn't needed for me so I haven't touched it in ten years. I also did the ad for Dom Pérignon and I don't drink alcohol, but I think it's a very civilized drink. Do you crave sugar? No. Gone. But I like chocolate. I don't eat it, but I like the smell of it. People can drink with their eyes; I can eat with my nose. I would love to have a perfume based on chocolate. " I can eat with my nose ." - White Oprah's newest diet mantra | |
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