The latest from Dlisted - Be Very Afraid
| What A Fucking Lady | Top |
| Just because Amy Wino now has a boyfriend who wears clean chonies and probably dabs the corners of his mouth with a fresh white hanky after he drunks voms into a toilet, doesn't mean she needs to hang up her crackhive and retire her messy drunken ways. And thank the bottle of well whiskey for that, because then we wouldn't have these glorious pictures of Amy Wino striking all kinds of " skanky sorority girl with a fake ID " poses last night. Wino performed a small set at the Jazz After Dark bar and celebrated the fact that she didn't spit into the eye of an audience member or pass out into the drum set by infecting some of her fans and throwing fuckfaces at the paps. If Hugh Hefner is ever looking for a centerfold for Playboy's Beauties of the Crackhouse issue, he just needs to put a shot of something strong on his doorstep and Wino will come a running! Here's Wino looking like she just crawled out of a dumpster where she was passed out face first in a pile of old extra chunky chili. Wait, maybe that wasn't chili. | |
| Open Post: Hosted By POOP Tacos | Top |
| Since I'm already punching at angels in the air over Rue McClanahan's death, I might as well go completely off the edge.....and I'm taking you with me! This is Fishsticks Paltrow showing us how she stuffs her taco with shrimps in a cooking video for GOOP. Thinking about Fishy's shrimp taco is the last thing I needed today. I bet even her shrimp taco frowns at her. Anyways, suffer with me. We'll all jump when she says, " DONESVILLE! " via POOP | |
| NOOOO: Rue McClanahan Has Died | Top |
| People reports that the angelic gift from heaven known as Rue McClanahan has returned home today. Rue's rep said that she passed away at 1 this morning from a massive stroke. Rue was 76. Excuse me while I scream "NOOOOOOOO" through the streets while tearing my hair out. I'll be back to write some more. And I'm back, but I left my heart at the bus stop so it can go to the bakery to buy my ass a cheesecake from C-Town to drown my sadness in. Just last night I came home with the drunks and soothed my dry heaves by watching an episode of The Golden Girls. It was the one where the ladies get robbed and Blanche finds out that the thieving thief snatched her jo-ree from the jar of flour she hid it in. Dorothy called Blanche an idiot, because she says everyone hides their jooree in the flour. And now I want to hide my prized Pac-Man Swatch watch in a jar of flour in honor of Rue. Rue's rep added that she was surrounded by her family when she waltzed off to the giant lanai in the sky with Bea Arthur and Estelle Getty. Rest in peace, Rue. And thank you for playing a character that showed me it's okay to be a big ass slut with a bitchy tongue as long you do it while wearing pastel florals. I've lost a role model in life! Now let's all form a protective circle around Betty White while she eats a piece of cheesecake by herself at the table :( | |
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