The latest from Dlisted - Be Very Afraid
| Brangie On Your Lips | Top |
| St. Angie and Brad Pitt were voted the celebwhores with the " most kissable " lips in a readers' poll on FeelUnique.com , so the website commissioned sculptor Willard Wigan to carve their heads on a tube of lipstick. Both tubes are currently up for auction over at eBay . It's up to $300 so far with 7 days left. All proceeds from the auction will go to the Breast Cancer Campaign. While Willard perfectly captured Brad's weepy, life sucked face, why does he have Lyle Lovett's hair and my Mii's eyebrows? And St. Angie looks like she's fucking caught in a windstorm. Oh, I get it. She's sucking the life out of Brad. Willard might be a genius. Jennifer Aniston is totally going to win this shit just so she can finally get Angie to kiss her ass lips and leave a mark. | |
| It's True | Top |
| Yesterday, I posted a video of Salma Hayek using her chichis of wonder to save a starving baby in Sierra Leone. I joked that the baby is now a mega genius who can solve the world's most impossible problems. Well, that was no joke. Salma's miracle chichis really do turn babies into little prodigies. During an interview with that troll Rachael Ray and Rachael's buff gymnast titties, Salma said her 16-month-old daughter Valentina can already speak three languages. She speaks English, French and Spanish. Damn and fuck! I can't even get English right and that baby has got me beat. Eff night classes at Sylvan Learning Center. I need to get schooled by Valentina. Or maybe I just need to nuzzle on Salma's chichis and they will give me all the answers. Salma also went on to say that her daughter sees ghosts! " Last night she woke up and her eyes were open. And she's looking at one specific point and she's going, 'No no no no, au revoir ,' which means goodbye in French ... And she's looking at someone, but there's no one there. was so scared, and I'm like, 'Yes, au revoir , whoever you are, get out!' And then she started saying it in English: 'Bye bye, bye bye!' I guess she was trying in different languages to see what nationality this ghost was to go away. It was terrifying! " Homegirl was showing off her premium language skills. And it was just Einstein's spirit visiting her genius ass. Valentina tutors him at night. VIA People | |
| Tameka Just Wanted A Little Lipo | Top |
| Usher's spokeswhores and the Brazilian hospital where his wife is currently laid up at aren't saying what " routine surgery" she was having down there. But you can always count on the Brazilian media to get their shovels out and dig for some shit. The news site G1 (via E! ) says Tameka was about to get some fat and her dick wet vacced when her body started freaking the hell out. Tameka reportedly went into cardiac and respiratory arrest. It all happened while Tameka was being anesthetized. Tameka had to be put in an induced coma for one full day so that her body could stabilize. Tameka is now in recovery. Her body was not having it, because it just dealt with giving birth to a baby two months ago. Some whores have been wondering why Tameka flew all the way to Brazil just to get some chunk sucked out. Well, the dumb bitch probably wanted to be sneaky about it. Some whores to go Brazil on " vacation " and come back looking like Dr. Plasticstein's newest creation. They just say a Tupperware factory down in Brazil blew up on them. Or something. I also hear that they are masters of the plastic down there. They are pros at nipping and tucking. Shit. I might fly my ass over there to get my no-no, bleached, lipo'd and lifted. It needs an extreme asshole makeover. | |
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