The latest from Dlisted - Be Very Afraid
| Open Post: Hosted By The iPad | Top |
| Here is the latest orgasm-inducing piece of technology that will make bitches sell their chirruns to get one. It's the Apple iPad (WITHOUT WINGS) as presented by Steve Jobs . Steve should really switch careers and become a Barker's Beauty, because he obviously has a gift for spokesmodeling. Engadget has a million pictures and details, but it basically looks like an iPhone after overdosing on growth hormones. Although, the iPad does look like it makes porn viewing easier. You can easily rub your genitals on the screen without a pesky laptop keyboard getting in the way. They better sell iCondoms to slide over your iPad. And MADtv is going to file a lawsuit in 3...2.... Now this is the iPad the world really needs. | |
| Charlie Sheen's Wife Might Be In Rehab | Top |
| One month after her (alleged) coke-fueled fight with Charlie Sheen , Brooke Mueller has checked into a rehab facility in North Carolina to dry up and fix her life. Entertainment Tonight is saying that Brooke and her mother arrived in North Carolina yesterday. Last week, Brooke was hospitalized in Los Angeles for pneumonia. Sources tell TMZ that Brooke does have pneumonia, but her addiction to the bad shit fucked with her immune system making it hard for her to kick the infection. A different source (ALL THESE SOURCES) tells People that Brooke still has fluid her lungs, and the doctors told her to get some rest if she wants to get better. And just when I was about to hit publish on this bitch, I read that Brooke's lawyer is swearing on her favorite cook spoon that she is not in rehab. He said that Brooke is in North Carolina, but is at a convalescent facility to recuperate from her pneumonia. He made it crystal meth clear that she is not in rehab. Why is this lawyer shoving baking soda in our nostrils and telling us it's cocaine? Who in the hell would go all the way from California to North Carolina to recuperate from pneumonia. Something in the pipe ain't smoky (just pretend that made sense). Unless, Charlie Sheen sent Brooke all the way to North Carolina so he can throw a prostitution whore party without her finding out. | |
| Why Didn't He Just Fly Away? | Top |
| Adrian Pasdar , who has been killed off a million times on Heroes , was arrested early this morning in Los Angeles after he was caught driving while the sweet nectar ran through his veins. TMZ reports that cops pulled over Adrian on the 405 freeway after they spotted him swerving between lanes. Adrian was apparently going 90mph at the time. When the cops shuffled up to Adrian's car, they said he smelled like he had just made out with The Hoff. Adrian, who is married to Natalie of the Dixie Chicks, said no a Breathalyzer test, so the judge set his bail at $15,000. To be fair, I'd drink too if I worked with Hayden Panatroll for four years straight, but this is why liquor stores were invented. Pick up some take-out-booze and get DRUNK in the comfort of your own La-Z-Boy. And all of you better take off your " Vote for Petrelli" button pin (I know what you're wearing one) and stick it in a drawer for the day. | |
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