The latest from Dlisted - Be Very Afraid
- OctoMommy To OctoPussy?
- Mrs. White Doesn't Understand
- Sean Penn Deserves Another Award For This
- The CAPTION THIS Contest WINNER For February 24th!
- Hot Slut Of The Day!
| OctoMommy To OctoPussy? | Top |
| Vivid Entertainment is piggybacking on OctoMommy' s fame (the visual just destroyed me) by offering her $1 million for just one porn movie. Yeah, watching dudes dick slap her c-section scars is really going to make genitals explode in excitement. TMZ says that Vivid is ready to make her a contract girl and if she agrees to that, her army of babehs will get full medical and dental insurance. But she'll have to do more than one porn. Well, bitches have been calling her Octopussy, so she's already got the name. Or maybe she can call herself Vaginalina HOlie? Either will work. And for titles I'm thinking Eight Inches Is Not Enough, STRETCH Mar ks or Womb Raider ? One of her "co-stars " can dress up like a giant sperm, she can dress up like an egg and they can do fucky times on a giant petri dish. Ugh. I can't. It's too early and the caffeine isn't even close to kicking in. I might have to shoot up coffee directly through my veins in order to deal. OctoMommy is every kind of crazy, so I wouldn't pull out my pit hairs in shock if she actually went through with this. Nothing surprises me anymore when it comes to this crazy. | |
| Mrs. White Doesn't Understand | Top |
| When it was announced a while ago by Satan that the legendary classic comedy Clue would get murdered by HELLywood in a remake, I screamed, I cried and I died. Then I told myself that this shit will never happen, because God won't let it. Well, I was wrong, because a director was just hired. A real director. Variety (via Coming Soon ) reports that Gore Verbinski will helm the guillotine which Clue lays in. Gore has directed the Pirates of the Caribbean movies and The Ring . Universal said they will turn Clue into " a global thriller and transmedia event that uses deductive reasoning as its storytelling engine. " What in the singing telegram fuckery is this?! A global thriller? The shit takes place in one mansion during one night! Fuckness. And it's a LOLcomedy not a thriller! They are totally going to make Mr. Boddy go on the lamb (typo, but lambs are cute) Bourne-style . Madeline Kahn is weeping from heaven. All I can say is that hearing this mess makes me feel " flam - flames. Flames, on the side of my face, breathing-breath- heaving breaths. Heaving breath... " | |
| Sean Penn Deserves Another Award For This | Top |
| If this shit is true, then I will quit this bitch and become Sean Peen's personal nostril cleaner. Shit, I'd be his nostril cleaner anyway. Think of all the sugar he's got up there. I'd scrape it out, sell it back to his cokey ass and use the cash to build the Mother's Circus Animal Cookie house of my dreams! The Sun says that Sean ran into his old bitch Vadge at her Oscars after-party. Vadge had Baby Jesus with her and when she went to thank Sean on his win, he answered, " Thanks. Another kid already?" Sean can do a line off my taint anytime. And I know you're thinking that Sean shouldn't talk since he's probably biting on Lindsay Blohan' s cokey puss lips. But let's be real, that bitch ain't a kid! She almost looks older than Vadge and that's saying everything. P.S. - Remember when Vadge didn't look like a velociraptor's dick? She was so hot back then. Nautical diaper shorts and all. | |
| The CAPTION THIS Contest WINNER For February 24th! | Top |
| It takes a village idiot to raise a child. - WTFOMGLOL Runners-up: and later, he will read the kid a story via Skype - Migraine Sally The road to obesity. - old straight guy See son, can you read the KICK ME sign on my back, someday it will be yours... - fleawatch | |
| Hot Slut Of The Day! | Top |
| Paul " PJ " James - This dude is a model turned personal trainer who is gaining the chunk in order to understand his fat ass clients. PJ started at 168lbs and his goal weight is 280lbs. He currently weighs 217lbs. Bitch should've just followed Oprah for a week. He would've hit that goal already. PJ told the Daily Mail , "I was finding it difficult to relate to my overweight gym members so I have decided to crank up my weight to experience life as an overweight person." Please, this bitch just wanted to bong it up and eat delicious things. There's nothing wrong with that. And while he's gaining the fat, he should lose that dangling nipple ring. It doesn't go with his new gut. | |
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