Thursday, February 26, 2009

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"Slumdog Millionaire" Kids Return To Heroes' Welcome In Mumbai Top
MUMBAI, India — The child stars of the Oscar-winning "Slumdog Millionaire" returned to India on Thursday to a chaotic but rousing heroes' welcome. Hundreds of well-wishers waited for them at the Mumbai airport, where dozens of police, some heavily armed, were needed to escort the children through the cheering crowds. The film, a rags-to-riches tale set in Mumbai's slums, was the darling of the Academy Awards, winning eight Oscars, including the award for best picture. The four children came out with arms around each others shoulders. The only girl, Rubina Ali, 9, clutched a small fluffy brown toy bunny. They waved and blew kisses to the crowd, showing off their newly acquired red carpet skills. Ayush Mahesh Khedekar, 8, who plays the youngest version of Jamal, the main character in the film, was hoisted onto someone's shoulders before the children where whisked away in waiting cars without talking to waiting reporters. It was not immediately clear where they were taken. With the film's success, the children have become instant celebrities in movie-crazy India, particularly Ali and Azharuddin Mohammed Ismail, 10, who were plucked from slums to play parts in the film. The movie's two Indian Oscar winners, composer A. R. Rahman and sound engineer Resul Pookutty also were met by cheering throngs who showered them in flower petals as they arrived in their home towns. Rahman, who won Oscars for musical score and the best song "Jai Ho" _ "Be Victorious" in English _ led the dancing crowd in chants of "Jai Ho!" "They (the fans) almost killed me with their love," he told The Press Trust of India after landing in the southern city of Chennai. Pookutty was also overwhelmed by his reception. "I never expected something like this," he told reporters. "This is history being made," he said of his award. More on Slumdog Millionaire
 
Ed and Deb Shapiro: What Buddha Might Say To Bill O'Reilly Top
What's with Bill O'Reilly? He does not seem to know what he is saying! Ed was at a Dalai Lama talk in London when the Dalai Lama said, "People say to me they are concerned about the Tibetan people. I say to them I am not concerned about the Tibetan people, they always have a smile on their faces. I am concerned about the Chinese because they do not know what they are doing." In the same way Bill O'Reilly, you are saying things that are hurtful, hateful, untrue, and steeped in ignorance. You said Helen Thomas is the wicked witch of the East. It is shameful to say this about a classy lady who is the best in her business and a legend of her time. You will not be punished for your anger; you will be punished by your anger. The Buddha There is an extraordinarily deluded belief that what we think, say or do will have no affect on us. That we can get angry, be rude, shout, put people down, incite anger in others, be totally disrespectful, and that afterward we can just walk away scot free, without there being any impact in our own life. But it isn't quite like that. We cannot hurt someone or something else unless we are in pain ourselves. It is that simple. When Deb was in a not very good mood (it does happen!) she went to run a bath and found a spider in the bathtub. In that moment she was confronted with a choice: to take the time to get the spider out or to flush it down the drain. In a good mood you will take the time to get a spider out of the bath or to let a fly out of the window. But if you are in a bad space then how easy it is to flush the spider. (Deb got it out.) In other words, inner torment will spill over and harm anyone or anything in its way. A single match can burn down an entire forest. This means that if someone causes hurt it is invariably because they are themselves in pain: a person who is wounded is one who enjoys wounding others, a person who hates themselves takes pleasure in hating others. A person who loves themselves will love others. But do remember when we point a finger at another there are 3 fingers pointing back at us. When we put that hate into the world it will inevitably find its way back to us and we become the hated. Some may believe that an angry person is angry and that's that, it is just human nature. But we can let go and transform the hatefulness. We can move out of a self-centered and self-obsessed way of being, to becoming aware of others and our inter-connectedness. We are not an angry person, just a person that is angry. Hatred does not cease by hatred, but only by love; this is the eternal rule. The Buddha Bill O'Reilly appears to be guided by bitterness and a dislike of life. He defends his ego and attacks others. Perhaps he has never experienced the joy of an open heart, of giving and caring for others, of unconditional love. But he does provide us with the opportunity to practice tolerance and forbearance. The Buddha taught we should never put anyone out of our heart. Here is a loving kindness meditation that we can do for those people (such as Bill O'Reilly) we are having difficulty or conflict with: Take a few minutes to settle your body and relax. Then begin by focusing on the rhythm of your breath while also bringing your attention to the heart space in the center of your chest. Now begin to develop loving kindness towards someone you are having a hard time with: whether a friend, relative or colleague. Anyone where communication is not flowing and there are misunderstandings. Keep breathing out any resistance and breathing in softness and openness as you hold this person in your heart and repeat, May you be well, may you be happy, may all things go well for you, may you be peaceful. Do not get caught up in recalling the story or the details. Hold them gently and tenderly, wishing them wellness and happiness. After 10-15 minutes, take a deep breath and let it go. Take this with you throughout your day. Who do you have difficulty with and need to bring loving kindness to? Can you bring Bill O'Reilly into your heart? Do let us know! *** Ed and Deb Shapiro are authors of over 15 books, and lead meditation retreats and workshops. Deb is the author of the award-winning book Your Body Speaks Your Mind . They are corporate consultants, and the creators of Chillout daily inspirational text messages on Sprint cell phones. See their website: www.EdandDebShapiro.com . More on Bill O'Reilly
 
Mona Ackerman: When Is An Affair An Addiction? Top
Q: I have just discovered that my husband is having an affair with his secretary. Actually, she let it slip, so to speak. I called her to ask about my husband's next business trip and she indicated that "THEY" would be at a Miami Beach hotel for the week. I was puzzled: What business did he have in Miami that required his secretary being with him? I innocently -- or I believe I was innocent -- asked him about the trip. He became flustered and then I knew. When I pushed him a little, he spilled it all. He begged for my forgiveness and said he was happy the whole mess was out in the open. He claims he has been going to therapy for months to try and stop the behavior. He vowed he would fire the secretary and that I should be understanding because his therapist told him he suffers from sexual addiction. My husband and I have been married for twenty years. We have three teenage kids still at home aged twelve, fifteen and seventeen. We met in high school at fifteen and have therefore been together for twenty-eight years. Needless to say, I thought we shared our lives, our souls, and our goals. I thought we were childhood sweethearts who would successfully continue down the path of life together. I have never known another man. I always thought he was loyal. How do I deal with this situation? I feel betrayed, angry, and confused. But shouldn't I also understand that my best friend is suffering from a real disorder, sexual addiction? And, if so, what does that mean for us? How do I help him? And frankly, what is sexual addiction anyway? A: Before we get into a deeper conversation about what is sexual addiction and how it applies to you, let's just make sure we clarify some other things in your story. I don't think your husband was really hiding his affair very effectively, nor do I believe you did not suspect what was going on. As a couple you are both obviously quite intertwined. You obviously know him well enough for you to have questioned his trip to Miami and why he needed his secretary there. You may not have thought he was actually trying to deceive you, but you did unconsciously sense that something was going on. He, in turn, was not hiding it very well. Your husband does not sound like someone who has been enjoying women often. He was clearly not sophisticated or devious enough to come up with a clever cover story. And the moment he was questioned, he crumbled and begged forgiveness. It almost sounds like he was waiting for you to get him to tell the truth. (In this sense, you're still best friends.) In addition, he probably found himself passively complying with the secretary who was more than happy to plan their trip and let you know what was happening. Who knows what she stupidly hoped would happen? Of course you should feel betrayed. Of course you should feel angry. These are all appropriate emotions. There's a crisis in your marriage and the two of you need to work things through. Since you have been together for such a long time, you may already have established patterns of communication that will enable you to reach out to one another, lovingly, while exposing some profound and raw feelings. Hold on to what is good in the history of your relationship, in your memories, and in the family structure that exists. It sounds like there must be enough there to supply the foundation you need. It is also important for the two of you to take into account the time of your lives when this is all happening. Is it possible that for your husband this is the dreaded and clichéd mid-life crisis? Is it possible that two people who started as childhood sweethearts will become curious about what else is out there -- what else they could experience? Each person experiences a moment in life where they wonder if they could have done more - is this the way it will always be? We need to know that we can still be adventurous, that we can attract others, and that we are living our lives out of choice. The two of you may need to accept the reality that you've been together a lifetime and it's time to rejuvenate your relationship. You may both need to change patterns emotionally, intellectually and sexually as well. Now on to whether your husband is a sex addict. Sexual addiction is basically a compulsive search for multiple sexual partners or an equally compulsive need to masturbate, seek out pornography or engage in something like phone sex. This sort of behavior can progress to illegal activities such as rape and molestation. In fact, 71% of child molesters are sex addicts. Sexual addiction obviously leads to a loss of intimacy and destroys the family as well as other intimate relationships -and can cause the ruination of one's own life. It often involves the need for power, dominance, and control. In other words, as with all addictions, a compulsive need takes over one's thoughts. Sex addiction sounds funny, but it can be a real mental ailment with its own listing in the bible of psychology, the DSM. There is also a lot of controversy and disagreement amongst mental health professionals about what constitutes sexual addiction and if it is too quickly diagnosed -as could be the case with your husband. The conflict revolves around whether to see sexual addiction as a mental disorder or as a narcissistic need. A mental disorder is one thing. A narcissistic need is something else and by labeling that as mental disorder we let the person off the hook. I believe you can see my own bias. When we paste labels on what was once just plain bad behavior, we divest the individual of the power he or she has to take responsibility for their own actions -and to control them. Obviously there are mental disorders that need to be accepted as such and need to be treated with the appropriate medication, talk therapy or combination of the two. But at the same time, let us not misapply the mental disorder label so that not only is responsibility ducked, but real harm is done. The idea is not to release the individual -and his family--from working individually and together on these issues. As for you, merely accepting your husband's excuse of sexual addiction does not take into account your own anger and does not include a plan of treatment that would bring the two of you to an understanding of what had brought you both to this pass. Your husband may well have a compulsive and destructive need for many sexual partners (or constant sexual activity of another kind) and this, of course, would have to be dealt with. But you both may need to become aware of what may be a fear of death and the powerful apprehension that as a couple you have not experienced all life has to offer. Go out and find those adventures together. More on Relationships
 
Adlai Wertman: The Army Of Unemployed: How The Laid-Off Can Change The World Top
With 47 million Americans already living in poverty, the newly unemployed will only serve to increase those numbers. While Obama is certainly sympathetic to this group, the homeless need much more than sympathy. The stimulus package offers very little to those who started and remain in extreme poverty. Middle class tax cuts and public works projects will do little to help the long-term unemployed and those who may never find their way in the job market. The 13% increase in food stamp payouts will not keep families away from food pantries which have reported demand growing by as much as 100%. This week's announcement from Kimberly Clark and Procter & Gamble that diaper prices will rise by 7% certainly doesn't help. The axiom states that 'as the rich get richer, the poor get poorer.' But what happens when the rich get poorer? Those who were not working before the collapse have fallen deeper into poverty. Even opportunities in the underground economy are falling -- too many people are cutting their own lawns today. Compounding the problem, while the poor have always given a higher percentage of their income to charity, no income means no giving. According to the Association of Fundraising Professionals, 53% of charities received decreased donations in the fourth quarter of 2008 (the time of year when many charities receive as much as 60% of their annual income). Is this a time, though, where we can apply a basic math rule -- two negatives equal a positive? Could a large group of unemployed actually be good for the charities? Without sounding callous, we now have millions of people with more time on their hands. And this is not just any time -- it is the time of able bodied, often highly-skilled workers. It is also the free time of those with college and graduate educations, managers, executives, administrators and finance experts. This idle talent pool needs to be put to work to bolster the talent base of charities whose backs are sagging under the weight of a 'perfect storm' (i.e. more demand for services, fewer options to help clients and less money to pay for staff and resources). I am not talking about one day events where a group paints a school house. While those events are noble and helpful, they don't provide the kind of real help non-profits need. They need volunteers who bring their business and craftsmanship skills and talents to the table. Charities need volunteers who will regularly commit to one, two or even five days a week in the office, classroom or clinic. There is a desperate need for the skills they can bring to bear -- marketing, accounting, organizing and human resources management, to name a few. So while Washington D.C. continues to grapple with stimulus plans, foreclosure rates and bank insolvencies, those collecting unemployment can become an army of volunteers in their hometowns. And while being unemployed is certainly a cause for depression, helping others is often a great cure. More on Poverty
 
Record-Setting Climate Protest Plans Gather Momentum In Washington Top
Youth organizers have planned a major conference and demonstration for this weekend in Washington, D.C. The event, called PowerShift, is also intended to organize the single biggest lobbying day in American history, putting environmentalists in front of more than 350 Congressmen and staff . The Guardian reports that the organizers of PowerShift are already in Washington : There are now more than 10,052 young people coming from all over America to the largest ever youth climate event in history, where they will lobby US political leaders to enact bold climate and energy policies that will rebuild our economy and halt global warming. It will be the largest climate lobby day in the country's history, and the first mass lobby of Obama's term in office. Coverage is set to be widespread with national TV crews and newspaper journalists arriving on Friday, including BBC Newsnight. House Speaker Nancy Pelosi, environmental leader Van Jones and dancehall artist Santigold are headlining and, with over 270 panels and workshops, organisers have had to hire the largest venue in the whole city. The organizers of PowerShift are the brain trust behind PowerVote, a popular energy campaign during the general election of 2008. That project asked young people to consider the environment when voting : This past fall, hundreds of thousands of youth mobilized to vote and demand bold solutions to the defining issues of our generation. The Power Vote campaign collected 341,127 pledges to vote and demand our leaders create millions of green jobs, invest in a clean energy economy, cut global warming pollution immediately, end our dependence on dirty energy, take dirty money out of politics, and re-engage as a leader in the international community. Power Vote helped turn out the record 24 million young voters who decided this election and develop the skills of grassroots leaders to engage in the political process. More on Environment
 
GIANT STINGRAY: Takes 13 Men To Catch In Thailand, Weighs 771 Lbs. Top
A giant stingray, no a massive stingray, valiantly battled 13 men before succumbing to captivity. As it turns out, this giant stingray was going to have some baby stingrays; she was expecting. Metro.co.uk reports in its article, "Giant stingray battles 13 men and loses," that a fishing professional, Ian Welch, landed this stingray in Thailand. Actually, it is unfair to give Mr. Welch all the credit. It took 13 men to get the stingray into the boat. (See giant stingray photos ) More on Animals
 
James Love: Stopping the Ticketmaster/Live Nation Merger Top
Sometimes you just have to say no. The Obama Administration is now faced with a merger so obviously harmful, that if it doesn't say no, it will send the signal that it could care less about consumers, artists, and small businesses. This week the U.S. Senate and the House of Representatives are holding hearings on a proposed merger by Ticketmaster, the giant ticket booking firm (it has been estimated that Ticketmaster controls 70% to 80% of all online concert ticket sales in the United States), and Live Nation, the largest concert promoter in the United States. As detailed in our complaint to the U.S. Department of Justice , the merger would reduce competition in the core business areas of both companies, it would likely lead to high ticket prices, while making small independent booking venues and artists both more vulnerable in business dealings with the new giant. Why was the merger even proposed, given its obvious harmful effects? Well, this is Washington, DC, and Ticket Master and Live Nation think enough money spread around will overcome the bad smell. One step they have taken is to hire Hilary Rosen to push the deal. Hilary once ran the Recording Industry Association of America (RIAA), before briefly working for the non-profit Human Rights Campaign. She returned as a lobbyist for XM Satellite Radio, and recently joined the Brunswick Group to push this merger. Hilary Rosen took a job to sell the merger The Bill Clinton Administration started off very soft on mergers, allowing almost everything to go through, subject to minor "fixes" such as minor divestitures or limited agreements on conduct. The first merger that was aggressively blocked was the Staples/Office Depot merger, which was stopped by the Federal Trade Commission, an independent agency not controlled by the easily lobbied Bill Clinton White House. The Obama Administration should not make the same mistake. It needs to show that it is willing and able to enforce the U.S. antitrust laws, and it needs to show that it is willing and able to protect consumers, artists and small businesses from a bad merger. ---------------- Whatever your views are on this or any other merger, you can submit comments by email here: antitrust.atr@usdoj.gov . The Department of Justice Antitrust Division reads and considers the comments, particularly those that provide an explanation of how the merger may affect you. Information that is marked confidential will be treated as such by the DOJ.
 

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